Social success story

Our June meeting will feature Angela Gaither-Parker ("Miss Angel" to her kids), director of The Autism Project, who specializes in teaching social and life skills. Participants in her programs range from preschoolers to young adults and are all over the autism spectrum. My family has worked with Angel since our daughter Leah was 4, and my description of what Angel brings to the table is pretty straightforward: She really gets autism.

Recently Angel shared a story about one of her longtime students, a teenager with fairly low language, but some excellent skills in other areas:

On Friday night I went to watch X (a student of mine for over 12 years) perform in a Choral Department performance at Calvert High. I watched in amazement as he participated in the program with his typical peers without any assistance or sign that he was different. He led a rap of MC Hammer's "You Can't Touch This", danced the "Achy Breaky Heart", sang several lead verses of other songs and had many typical girls from his school screaming his name. It left his family and I crying tears of joy. (And for those of you who know me well, I rarely cry).

While X will not graduate from high school nor will he ever drive a car, there were no signs on this night that he was any different from his peers. He was cool! And I mean, really cool. He was so proud to be with his peers and without any assistance. He was just a teenager with his friends.

I know nowadays that everyone has their eye on a high school diploma as the big prize. I am here to tell you that his family and I would never trade what we saw on Friday night nor what we have in X right now for a diploma. No way! X has a job that he works with other typical people and requires no assistance at all. In fact, they have recently increased his hours and are giving him even more responsibility. He is well liked and admired by those who work with him. He participates in social activities anytime, anyplace with whomever. He just likes to be with others.

My point is simple: X is a success. Different - but a huge success. He should be a shining example that life doesn't end if you don't get a diploma.

One of the other things about X that blows me away is that he's able to let himself in his house after school, make a snack, and entertain himself safely until he gets ready for work. I fantasize about my daughter acquiring that ability. Angel has quite a few students whose language skills and academic skills are stronger than X's, but X is right at the top of the heap with his job and community skills. His story reminds me that all of our kids, diploma-bound or not, need life skills. So do their neurotypical siblings, for that matter. Think about it -- how many of us have worked with fellow neurotypicals who drove us bonkers with their questionable work ethics or negative attitudes? Not a problem for X.

On Sunday, Angel will talk about the importance of social and life skills, and how she teaches them to her students. No matter where your child falls on the spectrum, this is a presentation you'll want to hear.

-- Alison Hamilton